Hello friends,
My last two K experiences are the most blissful, and
the most terrifying (in that order) ones I've had so far with this substance.
FranLover asked me in his
recent post what a ketamine bad trip is, and that made me realize I actually shared only my most traumatic experience with this wondrous substance. So for this post, I'll describe the most blissful one I've had.
I know a lot of people bash ketamine (and most other dissos) as frying the brain, but credit goes where credit is due - you can't deny its therapeutic properties. I have taken it somewhere around 20 times in my life, at most.
The vast majority of my K experiences have been pretty light (or moderate) in dose, but I have several deep K-Hole experiences too. Those were reached after I figured out my dosage sweet spot.
How I get the most bang for my buck is weighing out around 120-130mg, splitting it into two equal bumps and making two lines out of each bump. I drag the first two lines, and 10-12 minutes later I get the other two. That way I almost surely get into the hole, which is nice given I'm 100kg and the supposed hole dose should be at least 150mg.
I was in the toilet, doing as everyone ought to do before a k-hole dose
As I was sitting there thinking about stuff and preparing for the experience, I noticed a movement just outside the bathroom door with the corner of my eye... "eh, it's nothing" I thought. But then I started feeling this weird vibe around me like there was someone near me. Not a malevolent one, just a sensible vibe. I shrugged it off and proceeded.
As I got deeper and deeper into the hole, I thought more about my journey. A lot of emotions were stirred up in me. But I was asking myself if I'm ready for it, and if it's going to be worth it after all...And shortly after, I had the first ever intelligent entity contact in my life. I lay there on my bed, and I was thinking about my upcoming journey, and how afraid I am. Then all of a sudden a humanoid, blurred silhouette appears before me, on a black background. It's like it was made of barely visible energy, vibrating at a high frequency. I was amazed, but I knew right away what was going on. So I tried communicating with it. I said "SHOW ME" out loud. My voice was terribly distorted and I barely recognized it. It was like someone else was speaking through me.
Then the Entity put its "hand" forth, and I reached and softly grabbed it. As soon as I touched it, I was presented with vivid scenery. I've never been there (at least not in this lifetime), but I knew right away it's somewhere deep in the Peruvian Amazon. In the center of a circle of a dozen people, there was a big bonfire, shining brightly. There was a shaman sitting on the ground, with feathers stuck in his dark hair. He was rocking back and forth, singing an eternal icaro and holding the hands of the two people on his sides. The rest imitated what he did in perfect synchrony.
I felt like a part of this circle of people deep into the psychedelic realms of some substance (probably aya) rocking back and forth and singing in perfect harmony. It was the Entity's way of telling me - "look, it's all going to be fine...just hang in there and be brave".
After what felt like a few minutes the vision faded and I started emerging from the hole. My whole body was vibrating with warm energy and the only thing I felt was love. The purest kind of love. Pristine. Unspoiled. Unconditional. I was so full of gratitude and joy I could not hold it all in, so I just cried. Tears of joy washed down my sides as I slowly started recognizing the familiar silhouette of my room. In an hour I took a walk to contemplate it all, and the feeling of joy and happiness persisted for at least a week after.
This experience made me completely fall in love with the magic of K, and even the incredibly traumatic experience I suffered several weeks later could not make me change my mind.
I have nothing but respect and love for K. Thank you for reading.
Cheers!