I’m not 100% back yet, sitting outside and watching the sunrise.
It was brutal and I fought with Aya! Why? Because I had a reason to visit her, I’ve planned
this since we lost our little Gavin in the 22nd week, 2012. She made me ill and I had the purge both ways
but I did not give up, I told her I wanted to meet Gavin and I needed to know that he is being loved and that he’s not alone.
It felt like days of battles and finally SHE gave up because I promised her she could have me and do whatever she wanted
with me after she let me see my son.
The nausea disappeared instantly and I spoke to my son, he appeared as a fire flame, he said that he is fine and he’s not alone, he said that he loves us very much and to say to mum he is with her everyday.
This moment felt like seconds, and then he disappeared and I just let go, I was satisfied, Aya came back
and took me on a journey that I won’t do again in a LONG time. I don’t know where I went but it was not here.
It was hard to appreciate as I felt so nauseous and spent a lot of time on the toilet. I also became so dizzy from
being completely disorientated.
Will go to bed now and just try to comprehend what I just experienced.
I love you all!
I think there is hope for the human beings.
Safe journeys.
/Y
I am like a white cloud with no destination, I place goals to trick myself in believing I have somewhere to arrive, everything is a successful goal when I realise I have already arrived.