(This is a combination of short personal stories and ideas)
Through my life (i am currently 19) i always wished that something weird would happen to me, something unbelievable, something that will prove to me that things i cannot imagine and comprehend are possible in the universe out of my brain,i do not know why,but i was obsessed with that probably before the age of 10, i would think of how awesome it would be to be abducted by aliens or see a demon or a ghost, a gnome or have a conversation with a bird, hahaha,i find beautiful the way our brains work when we are kids, in the age of around 12-13 i questioned everything, i started thinking that even if something weird happened to me it would probably be in my imagination somehow, not outside in the physical world, a random day, not much long ago, i found myself laying on my bed with some LSD-25, the experience was just starting, i decided to go in my backyard and take some fresh air,but i could have never imagined what i would face there.. here they were folks,behold.. the gnomes,a whole bunch of them actually, they were singing something in a low pitch voice all together, i thought "holy f***, i would expect that they could sing a little better at the least" i stayed down and pretended that i enjoyed it,am sure it worked, because they looked like they thought i enjoyed it..and then whoooop, they went away, i felt relieved, i thought "finally".
generally LSD showed me a lot of stuff that i humbly believe helped me, i grew inside patriarchy, so i didn't know how to feel, or accept what i feel, it erased my homophobia and my ignorance about feelings of both others and mine,it teached me how to have fun,and that its okay to do so,and made my relationship with a person i met stronger than i could ever have made it.
After some experiments i did with psychedelics, i was constantly thinking, "well that looks like a portal to the weird and bizzare i always dreamed of"
"BUT, is it like..real?" One time on psilocybe cubensis (that i grew;-
i had this conversation with myself: "what is the universe made of?, atoms, and atoms are energy!, so if everything is energy in different forms, that includes my brain too, the same energy that makes up this tree, and the moon up there, and the mushrooms i just ate is also the same energy that makes up my brain, so my brain is a part of this universe as much as everything else is, so everything inside my brain isn't fake, its just inside this little piece of the universe inside my head" anyways i did a high 5 with myself after that, 5 minutes later i was in a place with a tree with a swirled bark and multicolored crystal leaves, "i think i have never seen anything this beautiful.."
Days became weeks, and weeks became months, still as excited with psychedelics as i was the first day i tried them, i never experienced that with anything else, my whole life i changed interests pretty fast, when i got bored actually..but that was not the case with the psychedelic experience, and it frightened me..
As i was swimming in the depths of the psychedelic internet, i found someone talking about a really small endogenous molecule, that is supposed to let you have a peek to other realms,that you can see demons and angels, tricksters and temples with huge domes full of elves that have conversations with you, its name was
N-n,dimethyltryptamine..i smiled and rubbed my hands together, "here we go again" i said, and researched everything i could about it,i got obsessed with it.. that is how i found this awesome forum too!
[MOD EDIT: <snip!>
No sourcing!]
In around 35 days my door knocked and i grabbed the "magic box"
Purchased some lye and petroleum ether,did my extraction(with info from this forum)
My yield was exactly 500mg of white crystals from 50g of material,it smelled like flowers!.
I called a special girl and said "come over,i have something to show ya."
"Hey...HEY,you hear me?,HEEEY"
"Ye- yeah?"
"One more hit"
"What?"
"You said to me to make sure that you take 3 hits"
"Gimme" *bubble sounds*
"Lay down now little one"
So now i am somewhere else, i am something else, well i am me, but different, where is my anxiety?, my worries, my constantly judging brain?.
I was in a colorful, constantly changing geometric temple, its main colours were orange, pink and blue, it had columns and a dome, i had heard about other people seeing temples.
But something else was there too,something no one could have made me imagine how it would feel,i couldn't see it, but i felt it, something alive, it felt so strong, so powerful that i thought god was somewhere around,and i really believed it, seconds passed and i was out as fast as i was in.
"They were right"
"Who was right?"
"The DMT people, this cannot be compared with anything else"
To fathom Hell or soar angelic,
Just take a pinch of psychedelic