So I just tried DMT for the first time 2 weeks ago, with my girlfriend and 2 close female friends from out of town. After the first session, I got a GVG and went to DMT land last week with my girl and one of those friends. Tomorrow it’s with my girl and the other friend.

Tonight, I was guiding the blast off for my good friend of 25 years. I turned him on to almost everything he’s ever done. I basically stopped smoking herb 15 years ago. He does plenty of MDMA with his wife. Probably 6-10 times a year. He does acid a couple times a year. He tried DMT with a dab rig at his house a few weeks ago. He got visuals and that was about it.

Back to tonight. I put on some chill music, lit a candle. We breathed and meditated for a few. He was super apprehensive all day. I was too. Even when I’m loading for someone else, I’m a bit sweaty-palmed. I have great regard for DMT. I got him 2 solid hits of 40mg on top of a little lavender and blue lotus herb. Did a pre-melt. GVG.

He did not want to take shoes off or lie down. He made that clear. He also cried and said “If anything happens to me and I don’t come back, you have to take care of my family. I reminded him that this is a chemical already in his body and is possibly THE quintissential natural drug.

2 hits. I held the pipe and lit, he held towards the mouth and smoked. I coached him through hitting softly then harder once it was vaporizing. I coached him through holding each hit. His eyes closed, and I don’t think he could have helped it.. Within the first 5 minutes his body went back like he was gonna lie down, but he pulled himself back up. He yawned 6 times. Never seen anyone yawn on DMT. His hands were nervously fidgety. At about 7 minutes, his eyes opened and he said “Where are you?”.

Upon coming out of it, he reported that he was fighting throwing up the whole time, and that he hallucinated that my girlfriend put rocks in his mouth and his teeth were crumbling. Fascinating. It should be noted that he takes a Xanax almost every night to sleep and he takes Percocet a couple times a week.

Ironically, this is the friend that I learned discipline and work-ethic from. He is an awesome father and provider for his family. We spoke at length before he left tonight. He’s got a bunch of micro-anxieties right now and that dictated his trip. I told him, that every time I do DMT it is a warm, yet intense experience. There’s no way I’m imagining it. As basically a brother, I was like “The DMT is not the bad guy here. You can’t pop pharmies and make DMT out to be something bad”. He agreed. I also brought up that for someone so disciplined in so many areas of life, he is harboring a lot of chaos. He texting me from home telling me that “things in his life have come to light” but it was before the DMT. I think this is a case where DMT is gonna pry that ego open when he’s ready to roll. He’s gonna have some contemplation time in the coming weeks and months.

I realized that I spend most of my life sober and that I challenge my ego and my own personal evolution almost everyday in my work life. I attempt to spread positivity at work, even when it’s tough. I’ve had a couple managers and owners of places I’ve worked that were basically gurus for me. And they have said I was for them. Back when I used to do ecstasy, I would always say “Theres Something more to this drug than just getting high”. Everyone would laugh at me as if I said something silly but endearing. I have sought deep meditation, astral projection and lucid dreaming. I have spent countless hours in nature pondering. Although I haven’t practiced consistently in a long time, I feel as though these things prepared me for this time in my life, and specifically this time with DMT. I thought I would be too emotionally/mentally fragile for some reason. I’m finding the opposite is true. I had 2 bad mushroom trips about 17 years ago and that was the beginning of the end of psychedelics for me. Looks like I’m gonna have to get on with some mushrooms before not too long. Can’t end mushrooms on a bad note...

"things in his life have come to light" is the part that sticks out for me, for a few reasons.

Obviously, this has it's implications for "set" as I am sure you would agree. I don't fancy myself an expert with psychedelics by any stretch, but if your friend literally cried before you administered his dose, there's no way I would have given it to him.

Although I have myself taken psychedelics in what I would consider a questionable state of mind and I do believe there is some value in doing so, i have only followed through after hours of thoughtful consideration as to whether or not it was truly a good idea. Never on a whim.

I think it's hard to know what someone's level of psychedelic experience really is. A few months ago a friend who claimed to have a bunch of experience thought she could handle 5 grams of cubensis. Ended up going to the hospital. Lesson learned on my part.