Hello Nexians,

I'd like to start by apologizing if I ramble on, there's nothing being asked for specifically in these essays, so I'm just going to write what I think may be relevant.

I'm a 21 year old college student from the wonderful state of Utah. Being from Utah, unless your associated with the native american culture in the area, it can be hard to discuss anything outside of jesus christ and joseph smith (the mormon prophet), making me truly appreciate sites like these.

My experience with entheogens is rather brief. Most people in my life are recreational drug users who want nothing more than a quick thrill, and I've turned down everything but marijuana and mushrooms in order to avoid damage to my body. I've considered LSD, but the LSD that has been available in my past is to be untrusted and most likely man made.

I'm an avid Marijuana smoker, starting when I was 14 out of curiosity, enjoying the high caused me to continue, but I soon discovered how much it calms down my over active mind. Once my tolerance built up and I stopped getting high and just relaxed, I realized I had something very useful in my life. I smoke more than a gram a day, and I smoke at least a little before just about anything I do. I quit for 4 months to remind myself of the way my body functions without smoking, but my mind started racing a million miles an hour again and my anxiety slowly kept getting the best of me.

As for my experience with mushrooms, I quickly fell in love with them. I first ate them in an effort to achieve a night of excitement. And for a time or two after that it was still just about recreation. I've ate mushrooms more times than I can count, but if I would have to guess, it would probably be around 15. However the most I ate at one time was only 3.5 grams, just being cautious of my health (however next time I'm looking to really expand my mind with mushrooms I'll probably eat at least 4.5 grams now that I've done some research on the safety of them, and watching people eat 7 - 14 grams). There's been a handful of mushroom trips that have put my life into perspective, and one that has rather changed my life (slightly). A good mushroom experience, I will have true appreciation for everything and everyone. I've always been good at showing compassion for people regardless of their actions, but on mushrooms sometimes I feel nothing but love, to the point of tears at times. I truly appreciate everything, and it's trips like this that keep me coming back.

The time I ate mushrooms that really changed my reality was when I decided to take 3 grams alone in my basement... with only like .2 grams of marijuana. I sat there just watching t.v., just trying to either put things into perspective and feel that love, or see some cool visuals. However with no pot to shut my mind up, and nobody or nothing to keep me occupied, my mind began to race. I was not having a good time, all I wanted was to sleep and relax, however the mushrooms were causing my mind to think faster than I could keep track of. I found myself bouncing around thoughts so fast I could barely keep track of them.

The only way to explain it was overwhelming frustration with my inabiliity to relax. There were absolutely no visuals, my hands didn't even look or feel wierd lol. It was as if my thought process was the only thing affected by the substance. The next thing I knew, my perspective changed. The only way to truly understand a perception flip is to have been there yourself. I saw everything through the eyes of the 10 year old me. Then I felt feelings and the perception of being 12. I don't know how to explain the different perceptions I was going through, but suddenly I found myself changing perceptions on command, flipping through past perceptions that I didn't even realize I had. My mind started focusing on the importance of perception to the human experience. I had a realization that perception means everything. This was something I already knew and most of us do, but when I experience seeing my television, petting my dog, and even the feeling of breathing in multiple ways within 5 minutes of each other it really showed me how the perceptions of humanity are infinite.

Other than this I've been caught up in the material world and the hunt for success. I've felt a great need to slow down and search for something more. I guess what brought me here was the discovery of DMT.

It's rather amusing actually, I was in the bathroom at school and someone wrote on the stall "DMT - Look it up". I just shrugged and laughed thinking it was just one of many chemical abusers in the area, but I did do a quick search, found nothing and went on with my day. I was sitting at home on netflix a month or two later, when I saw the cover of "DMT - the Spirit Molecule". I saw the big DMT and it reminded me of the bathroom stall. I said screw it, lets watch (something I most likely would not have done if not for the writing on the bathroom stall). I was instantly hooked. DMT has caught so much of my attention I'm trying really hard to keep my grades from suffering (even right now I should probably be doing homework lol).

Studying DMT has opened me up to the entire world of entheogens, ancient traditions, and concepts of the purpose of our existence I've never even considered before. These studies are changing my perception (changing my life) and I'm extremely eager to try DMT. I'm being very cautious, and I actually don't think I'll be able to sit down with my experienced sitter and try for months with my schedule. Along with my current entheogen experience, and the studying I'm doing, I'm excited to see the abilitiy of the mind (or spirit) to change reality.

Lately I've been looking for more eye opening experiences, and concepts I've never considered. But I really just want to put things into perspective again, however between full time school, 26 hours of work a week, and all the homework, I don't have time to do anything other than what I "need" to. I've actually been trying meditation lately, something I never considered in my early years, but the stress is still overwhelming.

I appreciate all suggestions... Whether it be something to read, something to watch, something to experience, or someone to talk to. Please feel free to give me any opinions and suggestions. I'm excited to be a member of this forum, if only I had more time to participate.. I apologize if I rambled on too much, or if I just left you with questions.

P.S. I'm praying and hoping the world changes this year.. This world is so horrific I can't even think about it without adding to my stress.

Welcome to the Nexus!

Thanks for the long essay, its always a good way to get to know more about the new members





Every LSD is man-made.. This doesn't mean its necessarily a bad thing, there are natural products which are harmful, and man made products which are relatively safe/beneficial. That being said, with LSD there is an added danger that it can be another substance sold as LSD. That's why we recommend people to buy reagents such as ehrlich (look up the subforum in my signature for more info), as well as looking under UV light (quickly because too much breaks down the LSD), because then you can see if its LSD or not.



Each one will have their own metabolism, psyche and lifestyle, so I cannot tell you whats best for you, you'll have to find for yourself. I can just say that from my own experience, while smoking daily certainly has its benefits/pleasures, over the time it takes it's toll, and it can affect concentration, memory, motivation. You said you tried staying some months without, which is good.. But did you try for example just keeping it for weekend use, or at least just using at night after all the tasks are done?

Also unrelated but related, how's your physical aspect doing, do you do regular exercise?




Please try turning off the TV when you trip. IMO TV sucks one's energy out, it's like it turns people into zombies.. If you're going to trip, a plant or even a wall should be entertaining enough that you dont need those flashing pictures to keep your attention.

Maybe try substituting TV for just some nice music, and have some nice art/psychedelic cloth or nature/plants to look at.. or just close your eyes. I think you'll be able to go much deeper and get much more out of the experience.

And regarding general suggestions and ideas, I definitely think you should read the links in the welcome PM you received, including the health and safety section, the FAQ and the WIKI.. That should be enough interesting reading/studying to keep you busy for a while, and you'll understand DMT and the processes behind its extraction and use much more once you do. Let us know if there's anything you dont understand after reading.

See you around!

I'm new too Just wanted to acknowledge your introduction and say Hi.

Welcome.

Quite a wall of text you hit me with. I hope you can find guidance and answers within this community.