Well i would first off like to say this is my first post after lerking over the forum for the past 2-3 years reading and studying up on every aspect of "the medicine" as i have been feeling the calling. being too scared at the time to order anything online i procured some seeds of various visionary plant since i had already had a decent garden of cacti (peyote, s. pedro, p. tourch, t. bridge (both normal and monstrose) in hopes that i could one day grow them out and enjoy the benefits, but that would take several years to achieve.

being pretty well versed in mushrooms (7g+ kind of a guy) lsd, 2c-i, 25i-nbombe, mdma (alot, and not molly ..blah) and of course MJ.. (ive used ice and coke before in the past but dont touch that stuff anymore, and only have mdma once a year IF i can find something i can test. after only having one bad experience on mushrooms after eating a quad on the way to pick up my turntables for a party that everyone else was rolling (bad idea). if you could imagine trying to hook everything up and they all want the lights off and for me to get the music bumpen. well i poked myself in the eye and didnt realize it happened as i was bringing in the speakers (dont ask me how, but i did) and then having to connect the wires on top of a plaid table cloth. but to top everything off i was in the closet at the time and i deep down wanted to express it but i couldnt at the time and it was eating me alive and the mushrooms were in a sense punishing me for not being myself.

i eventually got a bowl and went outside under the stars and put my feet into the pool and took a little break and calmed myself down and was able to get back to what i was suppose to be doing, DJing. well lets fast forward about 13 years and explain my ayahuasca experiences.

i normally suffer from a neurological disorder called CMT , charcotte marie tooth, that i have been suffering from since i was 15ish. having to take pain pills and a host of other medications all my life i had ended up becoming addicted you could say, never used needles, but was looking for a remedy to help with my addiction. well after becoming very sick and ended up being in the hospital for 91 days, a heart attack, collapsed lungs, tracheostomy and 4 chest tubes later i finally got out of the hospital for xmas eve.

after facing death and being happy i was alive i finally said fuck it, im going to find ayahuasca/dmt if it was the last thing i do. just so happends a friends mother would love to take mushrooms and we began talking about ayahuasca/dmt. she had me try do to do some extractions with no luck, so while i was in the hospital she found a group thru the santo daime and started he journeys working with the medicine and invited me to join when i was finally off oxygen and was able to get around without help (took a while, 91 days in bed i felt like i would never walk again it was that hard).

well the experience with the shaman wasnt that great.. i was the only one that ended up taking 2 cups worth and all that happened was a bunch of confusion, some slight depth perception and the shits along with retching all night long. i also had a lot of body load and walking felt like being super drunk. everyone else around me was talking to themselves and laughing at things but i had nothing, not even the slightest CEV. i had been arguing with my partner alot in the days before and i had tripped on some mushrooms like 4 days prior. taken pain pills clear up to that night skipping my night time meds so i didnt know if that had anything to do with the journey not going far.

all i know if the whole night was the most excruciating pain all over of my body. i wish i had the balls to take a pain pill so i could somewhat enjoy the night but i wanted to be respectful of the medicine. afterwards the next day i realized what i was doing to upset my partner and my relationship with my mother and how it was effecting my relationship with my partner, so i quickly tried to implement the lesson that i had learned that night and came home and apologized to both of them and things stared to look alot better with both relationships.

feeling like i was kinda jipped i had ordered some A/C and syran rue finally and then later got some rainbow b. caapi to give it one more try. well after successfully extracting the dmt i had some problems extracting the syran rue alkaloids and just left everything to the side for some other night. i was extremely bored yesterday and thought let me cook up a little syran rue tea and give it a try while my partner was at work. well i cooked up 3.5 g of syran rue and on the third boil i ended up burning everything so i stared the process over with another 3g and added the first boils that didnt burn and the decided to add 10g of the rainbow caapi to the mix.

i then ingested the ayahuasca/rue mixture and waited 5 min and then took 100mg of dmt and put on some icarros because i remembered how beautiful the music/noises the shaman at my prior experience was and i wanted to find something similar to that , but never found anything close.. just one part of one of the songs i choose had about 5 min of a song i remember him playing on a smaller guitar i believe , i could never really make sense of what the instruments he was playing but none the less it was beautiful.

after laying there with my eyes closed for over an hour and nothing was happening but i could feel the medicine going thru my body and i decided to take one more 50mg capsule i had made up. and about 10 min ,not even, after that i started to get the worst pain in my stomach and started to build up salt water in my mouth signalling i was getting ready to puke. so i made my way to the bathroom and couldnt even make it that far and ran to the sink and retched one of the loudest i have ever done (and i have retched alot from opiate withdraw in the past). as i was leaning over the sink my eyes closed and i started to see what it was like after vaping a small amount of dmt. it looked like coral snakes were going all over my closed eyes and i know it was suppose to be like this because i had tryed it not too long after extracting it but didnt like the taste and didnt have the proper utensil for vaping it properly for a breakthru experience so didnt do it anymore.

i was like shit this is starting to work and its coming on hard. still trying to vomit but with no luck i remember what the care takers at the last shaman experience did was make me drink a whole glass of water and that helped settle my stomach. it was still coming on stronger then i had ever imagined and i started to freak out almost, i wanted to try and call my friend for him to help talk me thru it and look up what can be done to help sober me up a little bit because my partner would be home within the hour or 2 and all i could think to do is drink milk but when i attempted to it was sour and i didnt want to drink something that would make me sick so i dumped it down the drain and just drank another glass of water and found a ginger candy and attempted to eat.

so i figured to take a shower to help sober me up since i could not read anything on the computer enough to be able to do any further research that could help me not have a total mental episode. everything looked like it was in a different language and the people on tv had shrunken heads and the colors where amazing but chould have been a little more intense for me. i didnt think to close my eyes because soo much was happening before me. trying to think of a way to tell my partner so he could lookup what to do all i could do is think im soo sorry for doing this, please dont be upset with me but never vocalized that.

soon as i got out of the shower my partner came home and i greeted him at the door like i usually do and got dressed to the best of my ability and joined him in the tv room. i wanted to confront him and ask for his help but i didnt want him to be upset that i did this without him, so i figured i could handle it, i know it will eventually end and i could just sit it out until he fell asleep and if im still going i will just enjoy it. well we had some conversations about what was going on the tv and i replayed to the best of my knowledge as i struggled with some words but i do that ever so often as it is.

i had taken the extra 50 mg at like 9 and by 12 it was pretty much ending which wasnt that bad, afterwards i kinda wish it was a little longer but was happy with it. the only thing i didnt understand is why wasnt there any body load like the ayahuasca i did from the shaman. im glad there wasnt because it totally ruined my experience before. so i imagine the body load was probably from a heavy handed brew of the ayahuasca (b. caapi). over all really enjoyed my brew once i took the extra dmt after waiting for the syran rue/caapi to kick in. im really glad the 100mg didnt work at first because that would have been just a little too much but knowing what i know of what to expect i think i would like to give 100mg a try.

when i do my next brew for my partner and i am only going to give him 50 mg and see how he handles it. well in comparison the shamans brew was really body heavy and is an experience everyone should try once, the whole ritual process and icaaros being sung was amazing but you dont need to have a shaman as long as you inform yourself in what to do and all i had to do is remember what did the shamans helpers do when i wasnt having a good night retching for hours and that was drink a whole glass of water.

like i said i would love to have had it last longer than 3 hours ish and any input on how to achieve that would be great. i was also thinking taking some mushrooms along with the brew would be a nice experience. also the next day (today) has been one of the best days in a long time. i have not taken any pain medications today and have felt great. it has been along time that i do not wake up at 6 or 7 am and reach for pain medication.

i would love to be able to cut amount i take in half or atleast to nothing at all if possible, i dont know if thats possible with the way i walk with my foot curling on its side and that just throws my whole body off, knee pain, waist pain and back pain.. but so far nothing today. im totally looking forward to the next experience. i hope this was a good enough introduction into myself and my comparison between ayahuasca with a shaman and a home brew. i also want to thank all of the people that have contributed to the many topics regarding the "medicine" here on the forums.

Holy wall of text. I suggest you edit this and break it into 5-6 sentence paragraphs.

As I doubt anyone will read it if you don't. I'd try but that's just too much

thanks for the suggestion, it definitely does make it alittle easier to read..

Thank you for breaking it up.

I would like to touch on a few things I feel are important. When you dosed Aya with the Santo people you say you took pills up until that night? I strongly suggest you read up on drug interactions with maoi. It's likely you put yourself in grave danger that night. You need to make sure that your body is clear of any and all chemicals that may interact with maoi's.

Set and setting are also really important. If your taking something as powerful as Aya and at the same time your needing to be sober when someone comes home, you are creating what could potentially become disaster. Make sure your entire day is clear, heck even the next day, wouldn't hurt. I cant imagine what you would have experienced had you had a full dose. Having stressful stuff on your mind like hiding something while high on dmt from a partner completely negates the entire experience. Why would you do that?

Don't rush this. Take your time and put your heart into the entire process. You can't let yourself free if you've chained yourself to the ground.

Hello and

I think it is very common for people to think everything will be ok and that they have the mental fortitude to endure DMT only to realize too late that when it comes on it is something they can't handle. Vaped DMT is in another league to aya so I hope you give that a serious try when your vaporizer comes in the mail. Sorry about your sickness, goodluck to you