I decided to vape a small amount of spice the other day and thought I would share my experience with you.

In the past I have been terrified of the spice because every time I've tried it it brings about this overwhelming sense of fear to the point that it prevents me from going further than one tiny hit. I get this heavy body load and a feeling that my heart is about to explode. Not good at all.

I recently started this medication called Propranolol since I regularly suffer from migraines and occasional cluster headaches. I've used low-dose psilocybin to deal with it in the past but Propranolol, a potent beta-blocker, seems to prevent me from having these attacks so frequently. It also takes away some of my physical anxiety symptoms which is a great relief (I'm diagnosed with the entire spectrum of GAD, OCD, SAD and panic disorder).

Along with 40 mg propranolol I had also taken 1.5 mg Xanax XR several hours earlier and I actually had no intention of having a journey that night. It was late in the evening and I was trying to sleep but after dozing off for half an hour I woke up for apparently no reason. Almost immediately my eyes got fixed on the bag where I keep my GVG. It was so strange, as if the spice was calling me, pulling me towards it. Within the blink of an eye I got up as if entranced, sat down on my sofa, put Shpongle on the stereo, loaded my GVG with an unknown amount of spice and without hesitation I took one deep hit.

It was amazing. So calm, so peaceful. Almost a tranquilizing feeling. There was no body load, no pounding heart beat and no fear whatsoever. As it came over me I heard this monotonic sound going higher and higher as the perceptual changes intensified. There were no big changes in my actual vision but as I closed my eyes I saw these beautiful strings of light flickering before me like northern lights in winter. Quite romantic in a sense, these lights dancing before me in all their sheer beauty. It was quite a show.

I can't say it was a very meaningful experience and it was definitely nothing close to a breakthrough. Beauty is the only way to describe it.

As the visions began to fade away I got overwhelmed by this intense feeling of joy. I began to laugh and I kept smiling and grinning as I went back to bed. I briefly thought about making another attempt to try and go even further but I decided it wasn't such a good idea since I had work the next day and desperately needed to get some sleep.

It was a wonderful experience and I will definitely try to go even further next time the spice calls for my contact.