Fairly soon I will take another plunge into the nether realms, as deeply as I possibly can.

I never took it lightly and this time the anxiety is heavy. It is an unusual anxiety, I want to go back, but I also know from experience how powerful, humbling, surprising and unknown what I am about to do is. I remember thinking as I was blasting through, Why am I doing this, again? Not a great thought. It was beyond belief but very frightening.

My last breakthrough changed my life, though it was terrifying it really gave me a reboot but in the experience I was taught to chant like a monk. I am musically inclined but chanting was never a skill on the table. I found it amazing that I learned a new skill or understanding during such an immense experience, what many perceive as a drug. I have been practicing ever since. I believe this skill will come into play very much so during this next experience if I can find the power and will to conjure it out myself or mentally project it in such an intense state of being; I think I will be in a better spot of trying to collaborate with the experience and thus have an experience in a higher realm, that is of a bit more light/positive nature. Do you as well feel that singing/chanting help bring in a more positive nature to the experience?

When my last breakthrough was happening I think what caught me off guard during that experience was what literal spatial direction the molecule took me in. At first it was straight down... when I felt a propensity to go forward. It took me by so much surprise that I was literally screaming in my head until the engine frequency started deep somewhere and blasted everything I knew apart.

My question is for those of you who have more experience than I with the ill termed breakthrough experience, what direction? Do you usually go forward through the so called chrysanthemum? I realize that this may be a misperception, that internally so much is going on that there is no way to indeed feel or know which way one is going. On my one and only breakthrough so far I did not even see a chrysanthemum, I saw a grid of pure light for a couple of seconds until it fell in the space like a painting on the wall. And then I fell, fell, fell.


Thank you