Short version:

Two trips within minutes of each other... One in which my beer goggles were turned up to maximum. The other that may have ended my use of DMT.

Longer version:

I may or may not have mentioned previously that one of my favorite uses of DMT is its alteration of visual perception. Specifically pinup art of beautifully drawn women/animated characters. In this regard i have found widely ranging results depending on the amount of DMT used. I can't give specifics because my measuring is never exact, even when using crystalized forms (vs liquid). However, what i CAN say is that i have always had the best experiences with images i find to be attractive. The more attracted to the character in the image the more potent the response is. Any one familiar with mixing erotic pleasure with DMT may have some idea of what i am talking about.

To put it bluntly, I have had some of the best sex of my life with no other human being in the room while on DMT.

That isn't what this post is about. But it is to accent the idea of interaction with unseen entities, using these images as a form of conduit or host for them.

I recently came into possession of a very excellent piece of work. I will attach a safe-for-work version to this post. While enjoying some lower doses of DMT with this image up on my 65" TV (connected to my PC) i felt a familiar wave of pleasure wash over me. I looked up to the image to see what to me has become a tell tale sign that i am not alone. The eyes of the being on the left of the image were glowing (more so than normal) and she had become extremely beautiful. On top of that i could see her smiling. Her cheeks and lips turned upwards with a cute smirk. I already felt she was very beautifully drawn, but now it was like i had been hit with some sort of love spell. The more i looked into her eyes the further i fell. This lasted for a while then began to fade. I spoke out loud to her of the pleasures i would bring her if only she were "more real than you are now". I explained that if she was interested in having more "fun" together that this would be her chance. That i was going to do a few more small hits to come back up, and for her to let me know. I said that if there was no interest in me that i would be done for the night.

So I loaded up my "Pleasure" audio playlist. Which is actually just one song on a loop.(I'll tell you if you want to know, but you wouldn't believe me lol). Then i loaded up my e-mesh with a medium sized dose, vaped it all at once, and while holding my breath melted a second smaller dose in case i needed it. After holding for about 30 seconds i exhaled and took in the extra hit. I then jumped to about the 90 second mark in the song, where it begins to speed up and crescendo. I then looked her directly in the eyes and for the next 5 minutes of my life i was glued to my couch and could do nothing but stare.

This woman/creature before me who before i said was extremely beautiful was evolving before my very eyes. My entire field of vision was enveloped with what i can only describe as a hyper-beauty filter. I'm trying to think of what the effect looked like, and it was like everything around me took on a golden/orange/pink shimmering/fluxing/moving almost fluid like effect. Everything except for her. Over the course of what i can only guess was just a couple of minutes (because of the length of the song) as the music swelled... so did she. She became more curvaceous,he face more beautiful, plus she was literally popping off the screen. Like i was looking at a 3D image in VR. I remember after exhaling saying something along the lines of "OK, wow. This is a new level, challenge accepted huh?" "Holy F*ck" are you still getting HOTTER?? Is that even possible?!?!" It was possible. It really was. She continued to evolve and become the most gorgeous, sexy, impossibly beautiful thing i had ever seen.

I also noticed that my voice sounded AMAZING. I have a low smooth bass voice. I do phone work for a living and get complements on it from time to time. But hearing myself speak was like the voice of a god. What was normally a single low tone was now in multipart harmony. Every word (which at this point was reduced to "wow" "holy sh*t*" and "This is amazing" was like sex to my ears.

Only for a few moments did i consider closing my eyes to see what was there, but i just couldn't look away from the site in front of me. The whole time i was seeing this i had waves of pleasure rolling through me from my toes to my head.

When the song ended, things started to fade in terms of intensity. So i yelled out "Alexa fast forward 2 minutes!" and within seconds i was back at peak(ish) intensity. I rode this wave of hyper-beauty for another couple of minutes before i could do anything but say "wow", and when i reached a relatively normal level i said "OK... challenge accepted and won". Then i said... "can we do that again??"

Although she was no longer the most beautiful creature in any existence, i could still tell she was there. I could see it in her eyes and that smile.

So i did my best to repeat the scenario. Except this time i did the two initial doses and loaded up third just in case. After the first two hits, i was feeling good, but not getting the same hyper-beauty experience (this lends to my theory of physical location vs hyperspace location in multidimensional space effecting where you end up). Instead i was feeling a deep carnal lust. It was like being in the middle of a pile of hot bodies all writing on each other. It was nice.. very nice. But not what i was hoping for.

This is where things went wrong. Very wrong. I looked up at the screen and saw here staring back at me with her beautiful smile. I picked up my vaporizer, loaded with that extra hit of spice, put it to my lips and said (to her) "Should I?". Immediately i saw her smile turn to a mixture of a frown and what looked like concern in her eyes. I said "No? Really? Your sure?" and took it away from my lips. Immediately her smile came back. I did this two more times over the course of a about 20 seconds. Finally i said "I only want to see that beauty again" and i hit it. Five seconds later i knew I'd made a grave mistake.

I was dying. I exhaled and calmly said "You were right. I shouldn't have taken that last hit. You were right. I'm sorry." I then thought to myself.. 'i guess this is it'. This is how the wife is going to find my body tomorrow morning. Messy man cave, porn on TV... She deserves better than this' I was afraid i was having a heart attack. I looked at my apple watch and my heart rate was around 140. I had gotten notifications a little earlier that night about it being above 110 for an extended period of time, but that actually normal if i eat too much (i had gastric bypass a couple years ago). So there i sat. Waiting for my life to end, telling myself 'psychedelics don't kill people' and immediately responding back with 'No, they don't, not directly.... idiot" I told Alexa to play some "relaxing instrumental music", and she switched over to some smooth jazz. It was nice, but i was still pretty convinced my life was over. After a few more minutes i came back to baseline... or so i thought.

This was at around 2am. I tried to go to bed shortly after that but i couldn't sleep (which is normally not a problem for me). My heart rates wouldn't go down. For hours is stayed around 120-140. I didn't sleep much that night. maybe a couple of hours. I got up early because i just couldn't stay in bed.

The next day i felt totally drained and weak. I had neck soreness like id been working out or straining. That night i also couldn't sleep. After laying in bed for hours i got up and found a blood pressure cuff i had purchased before I'd lost the weight. My BP was reading between 140-150 over 100-110.

The following morning (today) i went to a walk in clinic and had a ECG/EKG done. They said my heart was good and showed no signs of damage or stress. They took some blood to run some tests but i wont get those results for a couple of days, and they are going to reach out to a cardiologist for me to see. Sitting here typing this, i just don't know what to think except that i wish this headache would go away. Maybe it was the worlds most chill panic attack. I have a condition called Idiopathic Hypersomnia, which means not only can i fall asleep at the drop of a hat, have a full dream cycle and wake back up in just a matter of minutes, but people have described it as "living life on Valium". So, stress and anxiety is a relative stranger to me. Maybe this is what that feels like. Who knows. Maybe this was the spices way of telling me to back off, or that i have something going on that needs to be addressed. I mean... I lost my dad to heart disease a little under two months ago and haven't really processed it. I actually feel guilty that I'm not as traumatized as the rest of my family. But that's NOT something to discuss here. Sorry about that.

So... yeah that's my story. My night of Impossible Beauty and how i should have "listened" to her when she basically advised me to stop.

I can still picture her in my mind. That look of concern...

Hi PsychonautCX, thank you for sharing this personal encounter. I have had those hypererotic entities appear at my trips too, but always felt that this is a distraction I should not follow. It's not love. First they seduce you but their smiles turn to frowns if you don't follow.

The decisions you make in the hyperspace have real world consequences on yourself. It's possible to form dark spiritual bonds and one should be very careful when dealing with such energies.

If you were to encounter a woman on the street readily offering herself to you, you'd probably understand that there is a price.

Agree with every word.

It was actually hilarious to read at first that OP used the spice as a "madam". PsyhonautCX, please rename yourself to SexonautCX

I guess if you use the spice to eff the entities, prepare to get effed in return.

Be careful heading to hyperspace with goals related to gratification and carnal pleasure. That's not to say it can't be beautiful and meaningful when it happens, but it being a goal or desired outcome may have less than ideal consequences. It sounds as though you may not have reciprocated with them in an appropriate manner, and as such "they" didn't feel respected or deeply and truly appreciated. It's as though the frown indicated their perception as you only want pleasure from them.

How are you presently feeling?

One love

It goes deeper than spice. I actually feel a womanly presence throughout my life when I focus inwards. Lust to put it bluntly causes insane insane grief to the point I can not stand feeling it ever again. But funnily all my DMT trips are kind of similar. It feels as though flesh of a female soft texture is hugging me in any possible inch and it sort of plays with me after figuring out I like it.

Really amazing experiences. But I feel as though there are much deeper pleasures that the 'entity' is alluring to.

Man OP; what a creep.


Just kidding.. lol


When you went to take that final hit, did she frown every time you tentatively put the pipe to your lips? Or did she only frown that first time? This was not clear to me from your description.

Echoing what others said, I also do not think going to hyperspace, or using just about any psychedelic for that matter, with a primary intention of pleasure, whether it be sexual or otherwise, is a good idea. Of course, you can have pleasurable experiences, and should not necessarily shy away from pleasure, but allowing it to become the primary focus does not seem to be a good idea. Finding pleasure in a way which is wholesome is the name of the game (this rule applies for "real life" also). For example, if aiming for sexual gratification, having sex with someone who you are in a sincere, lasting relationship (a "sincerious" relationship seems an apt description here: a portmanteau of sincere and serious, coined by Ouro iirc) , or married to, is a good avenue.

Even if you are blessed enough to have a partner who is on the same wavelength as you regarding these substances, having sex is not always something that either of you want to do: you have to "feel the trip out", so to speak. If you listen to yourself and the situation you are in, you can often find an intuition on what to do, or not do, in that moment.

When I was young, I went into most (or all) of my trips with the primary goal of having fun, or finding pleasure etc. Now that I'm older, I'm not sure I will ever go into any of these experiences with that as a primary goal. If I'm lucky enough to have my life organized to the point that I am able to have some wholesome pleasure (sex, going to a museum, going to the orchestra or music event etc.) then I may do that, but at this point it would not be a good idea for me: if I take something in the near future, it will be with the primary intent being to work on myself, introspect and iron out some of my psychological problems. Just like you can seem to find an intuition on how to act during a trip, you find these same intuitions when sober.

It has frequently occurred to me that there may in fact be a cost. Often on low level doses i can feel my energy draining, but no pleasurable feeling in return. There have also been times where i've had entities "follow me home". One morning after a particularly nice dmt experience i woke up like any other day, and when i rolled over to turn off my alarm, my ummmmm... man downstairs brushed the sheets. The next thing i knew it was like i was semi-pinned in place, and.... well wasnt given much of a choice in what took place. Not that i minded. Just glad i was alone at the time. lol. Since then from time to time if something arouses me my entire body will experience a rush, like when you yawn/stretch and everything shudders. It had been hinted at one point during a mushroom trip that i wasnt alone in my body.

I have a trip to New Orleans planned for later this summer. I may see if i can find someone who can read auras/energies and see what they say (without giving too much away to sway their findings).

Sexonaut and the Spice Madam
I may need to write a book! LOL

I feel that if i had closed my eyes during that second trip i may have gotten a better idea of WHY i felt like i did. Looking back i know i should have but i was too focused on what i was going to do with the last few minutes of my life and how futile anything would have been at that point.

Its possible they may not have felt appreciated, or that i was pushing it. I do have another theory though.

When i experienced that first amazing beautiful first trip that evening, i got the distinct feeling of "I am now experiencing a demonstration of a product. A product that is used to modify perception, in this case to make everything around seem exponentially more amazing/brilliant/fantastic. I could almost make out a brand name/logo in the space around me. Like i had stepped into a booth at some hyperdimensional sales convention, and instead of sitting down on a couch and listening to a demo of Dolby Atmos Surround sound, i was getting a full sensory stimulation of my Audio/Visual/Tactile systems. I could swear at one point i "heard" someone say "pretty amazing, isn't it?"
When i went back the second time, perhaps i landed in a different exhibit.
Through my experimentation with DMT i have discovered that quite often doses (especially re-up doses as i come down) can cause location shifts of my consciousness. Like if i close my eyes and then once i am where ever i end up if i do another small hit (easiest using dmt in PEG400 in a tank using a vape) I will often transcend through various "levels" or "tiers".
Also if during a closed eyes experience i open my eyes even for just a second, it can cause my location to shift by the time i get my eyes closed again. This can really mess things up. I have accidentally caused things to literally derail this way (my dog barked at something outside and it caused me to jump and reverse blink).
So, its possible that in that second trip i ended up either embedded in a system (it wouldn't be the first time (i blinked into a power conduit line once... that was no fun) or perhaps it was another vendor, but instead of demonstrating a perception change of beauty it was more along the lines of fear/dread/anxiety.

I'm still not "well". Although the ECG came back normal the blood work came back with high cholesterol and blood sugar. I've always had high cholesterol, and had Type II Diabetes back before i had the stomach surgery, so i'm not happy that it is creeping back up again. I am making some lifestyle changes to eat healthier, cut out sugar, exercise more and i'm going to make an appointment to see if i can get checked out for a few other things like cancer, stomach complications (things like ulcers and tears can occur years after the surgery i had), Kidney and Liver disease and perhaps cholesterol buildup. I also have this nagging concern about the existence of an unburst aneurysm. Some of the symptoms line up to what ive read. Also my BP is still running pretty high. I am prone to kidney stones, so i was hoping that maybe i just got hit with a stone rolling into a bad place, because ive felt some flank pain the past few days. Thanks for asking

When i went to take that final hit she frowned every time i put the vape to my lips. Smiling again when i took it away. Like she was trying to warn me and i didn't listen. It of course also possible that she knew what i did, that these bumps can cause dimensional/locational shifts and it pissed her off. But it felt like the former. It wasn't a look or feeling of anger. More like concern/sadness/disappointment.


I only started my experience with psychedelics a few years ago. When Covid hit i went even deeper as a way to have experiences even if i couldn't leave my house. I was already "over the hill" when i started experimenting. In my youth i was pretty anti-drug. Tried pot twice, once in high school and once in college. Felt like i was going to cough up and lung and pass out. Couldn't stand cigarettes because both parents smoked (and singing was a favorite past time) and anything harder than that was honestly terrifying.

Then one day i discovered Mushrooms, tried increasing doses and came to the realization that they weren't the "visit another dimension" drug i was looking for... which led me to the spice (to be fair in subsequent shroom trips with the right tek, I've definitely gone places). This past experience has definitely caused me to pump the breaks, and look at things differently.