Pulled like taffy, in my head, this "breakthrough" myth, like how could there be more than this, will I remember what I have seen, what I have experienced? Reaffirmed Tao Way Of Life (Zen is just such a cool word) The way is committed, it is determined, engaged. The point is, it takes focus and will but I could see how it could become natural.
Went in looking for answers as to how I could move on with my life, how could I best act to positively impact the world, from here on out. Remain positive, embrace the mystery, follow the way.
Visual experience, I think, if others' experience reports are accurate, I still did not breakthrough. I told myself to not put down the vape until I couldn't not put down the vape. [Personal, sorry ->] Study them dynamics. Because why? It is more difficult than video games and media, it's true, and maybe you don't ever get a job that pays you to do it. And you don't have to do it exclusively but keep it as part of your routine. Practice a craft and maybe that can be my craft for now. Even just 30 minutes a day, on average, no sweat for a day missed. Don't let the fear of not being hired to do it drive you to neglect it in favor of exclusive entertainment past the job search. You like the material, so spend some time with it, no fear.
As sense of self solidified, concern for neurotoxicity returned with the buzzing mentioned below. But I always feel good and clean after so I shouldn't be too quick to apply damage to the buzz.
Stared at myself in mirror while still buzzing after feeling 100% in the flow. Spice provides solid visual affirmation of your connection or proximity to the way. When I inhale very slow and relaxed everything visually explodes, slowly, in intensity. And fleetingly I can move my body and feel very right, but alas I get distracted, silly mind.
The "mystery" is WTF did I just experience. If nothing else, let it remind you not to underestimate what your mind is capable of.
As for ego death, not this time, as I recall. Experience was decently long lasting though, for a pleasant surprise. Breakthrough....? Getting pulled like
taffy through a (sort of?) pixelated visual, evolving, both bright colored and dark field (well-lit colored shapes over, in, through dark background). I am not an outside observer to the colored taffy display and the experience is not altogether non-tactile. What you feel, however, what I feel anyways, is internal and intimate with the evolving display experience. It is 3D and it is visceral. Mmm, I want cereal.
But yes, in my mind was the question and dialogue of "breaking through" and the possibility of it being a hyped up myth, for what I am experiencing is already mind-blowing. I will leave my opinion at the door however and respectfully acknowledge your all's vastly greater experience pool.
I used an electric vape with little gobs of goo interspersed within a bit cotton ball spread out and then rolled up like cinnamon rolls and stuffed into a concentrate cartridge (simple metal container with holes that fits into vape).
I am working with ethanol pulls from CaCO3 basified acacia confuscia. This time I evaporated two golden spoonfuls of ethanol spice fluid. How much is two spoonfuls? More than one spoonful and less than three spoonfuls which I plan to attempt next time some time from now, just so we're clear on the level of precision we're working with here.
Looking forward to next experience. Last inside trip thought was feeling of need to be respectful of intensity of experience but at the same time acknowledging with a maniacal chuckle but I want more! Haha. I do want to see beyond.
Until next time, all the best! Happy travels!
CZ